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How to Be a Good D&D Player
There is such a thing as a good D&D player and a bad D&D player. I am not talking about their experience in the game or their ability to build a strong character. I am talking about their table etiquette.
You can have the coolest character, but if you are considered a bad player, you won’t be getting invited to play D&D. However, if you are a good D&D player, the Dungeon Master, and the other players will want you at the table for every session.
After brainstorming with my players, we came up with a list of five things that make a great D&D player. Some of these things are table etiquette, and some are player responsibilities to keep in mind.
Now without further ado, onto the list!
1) Be Reliable
Dungeon Masters look for reliable players. Scheduling a D&D session is not easy. It is even harder to reschedule a session once it is already scheduled. Help the DM and the other players by making it as easy as possible to plan around you.
One way you can do this is by being responsive. When the DM asks for availability, you should give it right away.
If you cant give them dates when you are available, then they can’t schedule a session with you.
When the DM sets the date, you should acknowledge it and write it down. The DM shouldn’t have to remind you when the session is.
Things happen. If you need to cancel, let the Dungeon Master know ahead of time. This way, they plan the session around the absence of your character.
The worst thing you can do is show you don’t care. Either by not showing up, canceling the day of, or not responding when the DM asks for your availability.
I used to have a player who took on average about three days to respond to me every time I asked them for their availability. Their inconsistency was frustrating to both the players and me. I no longer invite that player to my D&D games.
Being reliable also means showing up on time, if not early. When the DM says, the session is at 2 pm. Show up at 1:30 pm and help the DM set up. This dedication will mean a lot to them.
Don’t be that person who is late. When someone is late, everyone else typically sits around awkwardly waiting. It shows the group you don’t care about them or value their time. It also kills the energy of the group… speaking of energy.
2) Have Great Energy
Something I tell my players before we start a session is,
“The energy of this session is only going to be as high as the highest person in this room and as low as the lowest person, so let’s keep the energy high.”
Part of what makes D&D such a beautiful experience is that everyone builds off of each other’s creative energy.
If one player decides to roleplay deeply and gets into character, it encourages the other players to do so as well. If one player uses a unique character voice, suddenly, the other players want to do it as well.
Another thing that goes into having high energy is not being a sore loser.
If something goes poorly in-game or you roll a bunch of critical fails. Laugh it off. Its the randomness that makes Dungeons and Dragons great.
Don’t get angry and throw a fit, don’t yell at the DM if you bump into an obstacle. It’s the DM’s job to throw challenges at the players and the player’s responsibility to come up with creative solutions.
Lots of dice are being rolled every session with random outcomes. Your character has the potential to die in each session. This does happen, and you need to understand that it is part of the game.
From my experience, player deaths are when a person truly shows what type of player they are. I’ve had some players laugh it off and die gloriously, ready to come back with a new character. I’ve also had some players ruin the rest of the session for everybody. Being grumpy, angry, and making us end the session early.
It’s pretty apparent which player you’d rather have at your table, right?
The last tip here is to get some sleep the night before! To have high energy, you need to make sure you get a good night’s rest.
I once had a player show up who got no sleep the night before. Their reactions were slow, their attention span wasn’t there, and they started to yawn a lot.
This made other players and myself start to yawn as well, bringing the energy of the room down and slowing the pace of the game, which ties into number three!
3) Keep the Pace Going
There are two types of players, one that slows the pace of the game and one that keep the pace going.
One of the best ways you can do this is by knowing the rules. Know your character’s abilities and spells. That way, you don’t have to stop and look them up mid-session.
If you want to go above and beyond, have your own copy of the Player’s Handbook
Not only will this be a useful resource for yourself, but you can also help others out when they have questions too. This frees up the DM and lets them focus on running the game rather than answering questions.
In combat, know what you want to do before your turn starts. Combat is one of the slowest parts of Dungeons and Dragons. Having people wait around while you think of what you want to do slows down the game.
I have a D&D House Rule that helps with this issue. “A player has ten seconds to come up with what they want to do, or else their turn is skipped.” It might seem a little aggressive, but that’s how I keep combat moving when running a game with six players.
Have your character sheet and dice ready. Players often forget this. We’ll start the session, but a player forgot to pull out their character sheet or dice. Then we all sit around waiting for them. It gets worse if you forgot to level up your character before the session.
I once had a player who every time we started the session would say, “Oh, I forgot to level up.” So we would all need to wait for them. Needless to say, that player is no longer invited to back to my sessions.
Have proper dice etiquette.
Aim! Don’t roll dice off the table. Searching for dropped dice slows down the game.
Don’t build dice towers. Eventually, they fall and distract everyone.
Roll your dice only when you need to. I’ve caught players rolling dice over and over again, entertaining themselves because they aren’t participating in the current scene.
Remember, you are playing with other people. Make sure to limit the distractions, and don’t forget to…
4) Share The Spotlight
One of the most important things you need to keep in mind is you are playing a game with other people. D&D is a collective storytelling experience. NOT YOUR OWN.
D&D classes are designed in a way that allows them to build off of each other’s strengths and weaknesses.
Give other players a chance to shine. Ask them for their input on a plan, instead of running in headfirst. You want your character to feel fun and valuable to the party, not like a nuisance.
Sharing the spotlight also goes for roleplay as well. Sometimes one or two players will split from the group and do their own thing. They might start roleplaying with the DM while the rest of the table just waits. The players who are waiting should be respectful. They should listen to what is happening.
The worst thing they can do is be a distraction. This can happen by interrupting them or chatting with the other players who aren’t in the scene.
Suppose one character is having a deep backstory moment with the DM. Have respect for them and listen. Don’t talk about your plans for the weekend with the other players. Save that for after the session. Shut up and watch the magic moment happen.
Show that you care about the other players by actively listening. They will appreciate it. Speaking of appreciation…
5) Have Gratitude
I believe D&D is a collective experience of giving. Everyone needs to put in the effort to make the session great. Putting together a D&D game can be challenging. Show the Dungeon Master and the other players you value them and the game.
There are a couple of simple ways you can do this.
One easy way to do this is by bringing food. D&D is a gathering of friends and good company, make it a celebration.
Once the session is over, help clean the space, don’t disappear. Enjoy the company of the other players after the session. Great D&D groups are the ones where players hang out outside the sessions.
Don’t forget to thank the DM and the other players.
Tell the DM what you liked about the session. This will motivate them to have more sessions and learn how to be a better DM.
Thank the other players. Compliment something about their character or what they did that session that impressed you. If you appreciated the level roleplaying they did, be it emotional things, funny things, or even their accent, let them know. You’ll see more of it.
If you show people you value the effort they are putting into this collective experience that is D&D. People will appreciate you appreciating them. Then they are going to want you back as a player.
Overall How to Be a Great D&D Player
If you make the Dungeon Master’s job easier, you’re a good D&D player, if you make their job harder, you’re not a good D&D player.
The same goes for interacting with the other players. If you add value to the group by being at the table, you’re a good D&D player. If you are a nuisance to the party and a distraction at the table who slows down the game, you’re not a good D&D player.
It’s that simple, but as you can tell, there are a lot of little things that go into it.
If you found this helpful, please share this with your D&D group. That way, everyone can learn how to be better players.
